This Is My Mind Today
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Imagined (?) beehive network of female group chats to alleviate crushing sense of own insignificance;
writing it all down to alleviate crushing pressure of believing self too significant.
It stops being investigative
The moment you start rhyming
“Stop putting words to it ,” she said.
“You are a leaking hose in need of bucket
Bent into your own dick
Too much of a pussy to even suck it”
“Everything dies, baby,” I quote
That’s a fact
“And maybe everything that dies
Does so for what I, just me, alone, lack”
She hates Springsteen
Hence; her back
+_
Owen Gray
James Deen
What else can I say?
This is my mind
This is my mind today
_+_
Hoping to machè my moments of splendor,
I start by counting backwards
From the moment I met her
Yea I have reclaimed my balls
I let her know who she is messing with when she does not return my 56 calls
Limited minds in small rooms concocting things nobody needs
That’s me
Swinging for the fences wearing 7 different sleeves
Raymond Carver imitating Henry Miller transcribing his Anima
Voice
Voice
You have become a scared, old Nana
Messages heard in hideous blue hues
repulsive clues
Why are these the messages coming through?
I must not be available to subtler tunes
So I go backwards from the moment I met her
Back when I knew about splendor
+
You have sad dog eyes, she said
I thought I’d hidden them
In a red booth,
As Billy Joel’s Vienna played,
Moving through recycled lines
On a date
Vienna played,
but didn’t wait.
+_+_
Random Lady at the airport told me I was “amazing”
But she couldn’t remember why
I helped her find name of the TV show
That used to pay for much more than just my time
”My Face entered the Faustian bargain,” I explained to her.
Marquis de SAD
in bed, waiting for envy to subside
“If you don’t want to have to use ugly words, you’ll have to stop doing ugly things,”
*sigh
+_+_
I keep an open door policy to all
(Who fit my specific qualifications)
(For the design of my downfall)
I live life as a brunette goldfish.
I play into the hands of her scheme
I simply have nowhere else to
be
+_+_+_+
Now you’re alone in Mexico
And you shit your pants today
And you are happy
+_+_+_
